


Off the Couch

by Reality 2_1 (reality_2_0)



Category: Political RPF - US 21st c.
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-25
Updated: 2013-12-25
Packaged: 2018-02-16 11:39:58
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,349
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2268351
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/reality_2_0/pseuds/Reality%202_1
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>set February/March 1999; the couple reconnects</p>
            </blockquote>





	Off the Couch

She sighed when she got into the bathtub, slowly lowering herself into the warm, soothing water. There was nothing better to leave the worries of the day behind than running a bath. Once she was fully engulfed, she closed her eyes, her mouth curling into a small smile. They all had habits they couldn’t shake, one of hers being always thinking of William Taft when she took a bath in the White House. There weren’t many people who could tell you something about his politics, his goals, his dreams but quite a lot of them knew he had gotten stuck in his bath tub, leading him to having an oversized one installed some time later. ‘Big Bill’ as he was called, had weighed over 330 pounds, the tub he installed able to accommodate four normal-sized men. The tub had been replaced in 1952, and to be honest, she preferred the one they had today.

Her smile disappeared. When she had heard the story about Taft for the first time, she had wondered how it must have been for him having people make fun of him, his weakness being a topic of public discussion.

Ever since Bill had started running for president, she had learned more about this than she had ever wanted to. She bit down her lip hard. If she thought about this now, it would all come back to her, the humiliation, the disappointment, the anger. She had taken this bath to get away from it all for a while, not to sink even deeper into the well of her emotions.

She took a deep breath, concentrating on the scent lingering in the room, stemming from the oil she had used when she had poured her bath, the candles she had lit, listening to the soft jazz music playing in the background. Right now, she was alone, with no one to watch her closely, no one wanting to judge her every movement, her every word. This was her private time, and she would make the most out of it.

For the next few minutes, she hardly moved, didn’t think, and she could slowly feel the day’s stress wearing off. If she didn’t take care, she’d fall asleep sooner or later. It wouldn’t do to add the story of the first lady that drowned in the tub to the accumulation of stories and mysteries about this place, would it? She almost didn’t hear the door being opened, and she sat up with a start, ready to reprimand whoever it was disturbing her now without even bothering to knock beforehand.

It was the man she loved, the one she had trouble staying in the same room with lately. Still, she missed him. He had been her best friend for so long, the one who had supported her like no one else. Looking at him, she wished she could stop loving him. It would make everything easier, or wouldn’t it?

“What’s the problem?” she asked now, wondering if he would step closer or linger over there, the physical distance a stark reminder of their emotional one.

“There’s no problem, at least not job-wise. I... wanted to talk to you.”

He seldom hesitated while speaking, and she almost felt pity for him.

After they had hardly talked for what seemed ages, they had talked almost too much during the last weeks. It was emotionally draining, all but wiping out the easy friendship between them. If nothing else, they had always fought on the same side. Now, she wasn’t so sure about it any longer. They did when it came to their jobs; yet, she wondered if they’d be able to salvage their personal relationship. Even beginning to understand his motives on an intellectual level, it didn’t make this bitter pill any easier to swallow.

Right now, he was waiting patiently for her to say anything. She was of a mind to ignore him or send him out. If she only could. Sometimes, she thought he was her weakest spot, but for a long time, she had thought he was her strongest one as well.

“What about?”

He stepped a little closer, his hands in the pockets of his pants. Even in his fifties he was still an attractive man, and she couldn’t help enjoy looking at him. He was everything one could wish for in a man, tall, strong, with intense eyes, a beautiful smile, elegant hands... Her grandmother had warned her of men looking like him, those who would break your heart because the attention of a single woman could never be enough for them.

He wasn’t like this, though. In spite of all his shortcomings, she believed him that it wasn’t because she wasn’t enough for him. Still... he had broken her heart a few times over the years, each time he hadn’t been able to battle his inner demons, had given in to the darkness lurking inside him.

If she had wanted, she could have gotten even. There had been hints, offers... Not many, as most men preferred their women a little less opinionated, headstrong, but more than a handful anyway. She had declined them all, didn’t feel the need to share her body with another man for the physical sensation and all the wrong reasons alone.

Once she had gotten a taste of how it felt when desire mingled with love, to feel complete for a short moment in time, she didn’t want anything else. What she needed she could get from her husband and if he was not available, she knew how to help herself.

“I miss you,“ he said quietly.

She looked at him for a long moment. It would be easy to mock him, tell him it was highly unlikely as they were seeing each other most days. She didn’t. Not only would it be cruel and beneath her, but there was something to his voice, an honesty that called out to her. And to be honest, she missed him, too, wished she could erase the last time, all the hurt and emotional pain. It wasn’t even the act, what he had done that had hurt the most, it was the fact that he had denied it, had looked into her eyes and lied.

“I miss you, too,” she said, surprised at how sad and tired she sounded.

But when had she begun to think she had to be strong when she was around him? Wasn’t he the one she could truly be herself with? She watched him stepping closer, kneeling down in front of the tub, reaching for her hand.

“I don’t want our relationship to fall apart. I need you.”

So many things were running through her mind, yet she didn’t voice any of them. Her mind and her heart were not on the same page anymore when it came to him.

“Are you going to talk to me again?” he asked.

“I’m not sure what to talk about. I think trying to work through this is hard enough on both of us, I don’t need more of it right now.”

“How about you tell me how you’re doing? Really doing.”

She took a moment to think about it.

“Not very well. With the press on our backs, the work... There’s only work these days. It’s like I’m missing the balance in my life.”

She didn’t mind hard work, never had, even wanted and needed it. There was so much she wanted to achieve. Still, for years, there had been her family, there had been him to come home to at the end of a long day. There had been laugher, love, quiet understanding, compassion –so many good things that almost made her forget the fighting throughout the day. Although, if she was honest with herself, it all had changed a little during the last years. They had had less and less time for each other, were often too engrossed in their work, too imprisoned in their minds to be the support the other needed.

“And this is a lot like counselling, you know,” she said.

He smiled a little, and so did she. His hand squeezed hers, and he was really looking at her.

“I think accepting the fact we needed counselling was one of our best decisions in the last years.”

“It was,” she agreed. While they wouldn’t have reached the breaking point if he hadn’t had an affair and lied about it to virtually everyone, their relationship hadn’t been what it once was. This wasn’t only his fault but hers as well. She knew she had stopped to listen, really listen. It’s not that she hadn’t cared, just that there had been so much going on all the time. He had always been good at keeping his worries, his darker thoughts inside until it got too much and he had to find a way to let off steam.

Ironically, she thought they hadn’t lost their love along the way, that it was still present and keeping them going, but that it was their friendship that was dying a slow, painful death. She loved him, no question about it, but in the last months, she hadn’t particularly liked him.

She wanted his friendship back, needed it to survive the chaos around them.

“Is there anything I can do for you?” he asked, stroking the back of her hand with his thumb. As if transfixed, she looked at their joint hands, the tender caress sending a shudder down her back while it warmed her heart in a way that the hottest tub wouldn’t manage.

“I would like for you to get in here with me.”

She had surprised them both. His eyes widened a little while his gaze pierced her, trying to find out if she was serious.

She was. It was too tiring to resist her heart’s desire again and again. If she couldn’t part with him and her heart felt as if it would break without him in her life, she had to learn how to embrace him again.

“Are you sure?”

She smiled. “If you ask me again, I might have to rethink my invitation.”

He closed his eyes for a long moment, bowed his head while he kneeled utterly still. She could only guess the emotions running through him, but she couldn’t help the protectiveness, the tenderness raging through her veins.

“Thank you,” he said before he got up.

She moved into a more upright position, waiting for him to begin undressing. He did so slowly as if still unsure if she would change her mind at any given moment.

“I need you,” she said, daring to speak her mind.

Every relationship needed a leap of faith from time to time. She wanted to trust him that he wouldn’t break her heart all over again.

“I need you, too.” A sad smile grazed his face. “I need you more than you could ever need me.”

She thought he was wrong but didn’t correct him. His shirt was now fully unbuttoned, and he let it sink to the ground, kicked it aside. He wore a t-shirt underneath which was discarded in short order, revealing his strong arms, his broad chest. Especially when they were younger, fresh in love, she had liked to use him as a pillow while he had been stroking her hair. They had talked for hours on end about their goals in life, how they wanted to change the world. She liked to think they had managed at least a little of what they had wanted to achieve.

Finally, he was fully undressed, and she couldn’t help but think he was still beautiful. He wasn’t a young man any longer, but he was still strong, appealing, making her want him without even trying. Everything inside her longed to feel him close.

“Come,” she said, holding out her hand to him.

He took it, stepped into the tub, letting out an appreciative sigh when he sat down opposite of her.

“This feels good.”

“It does.”

She knew this could go both ways now: either awkwardness clouding the moment or forgiveness paving the road to their future.

“I want you back in my life,” she said, before she got up on her knees, bridging the short distance between them. He opened her arms to her, and with a sigh, she sank into his embrace, moving so she was straddling him.

As she felt his skin against hers, something inside her gave in to the inevitable. Sometimes, she couldn’t live with him, but she could never live without him. He was the only one making her feel alive on every level. He seemed to feel the same as his breath caught in his lungs, his cock hardening against her.

It was an exhilarating feeling to know she still had such an effect on him. No matter what had happened between them, he still wanted her. It wasn’t only his physical reaction to her, but even more, the way one of his hands wound into her hair, how he murmured her name with reverence.

For what seemed like a long time, they remained like that, and she would have been content with feeling his heart beat, with listening to his soft exhales of breath.

“I’m sorry,” he began, interrupting the moment, but she didn’t want to talk about it, couldn’t.

Sitting up a little, she put a finger on his lips. “No. Don’t.”

This wasn’t therapy. Right now, she wanted to enjoy being with him, to feel comfortable in his presence again. That she could endure him this close, welcomed it even told her healing was possible. She wanted it badly, wanted her marriage to succeed, professional reasons being the last of it.

She wasn’t sure what he saw in her eyes, but he hesitated, his own gaze going from devastated to tender. It would be so easy to sink into his gaze.

Pulling her impossibly closer, he stopped just short of their lips connecting, his breath warm on her face.

Her heart began beating faster, and she held her breath, waiting for him to bridge the minute distance. One second morphed into the other until she couldn’t stand the separation any longer, realised he was waiting for her. It had to be her decision, she had to accept him back into her life.

The first contact of their lips was a bit hesitant, light, but it sent a shockwave of pleasure through her body. His lips were full, soft, fitted her perfectly. Pulling away, seeing his eyes half-closed, she leaned in again. This time, the contact lasted longer, his lips moving against hers. They instinctively found their own rhythm, just as they always had. They kissed for a long time, reconnecting, sharing one of the most intimate human connections.

His cock hardened further, which had her moan out longingly. She needed more, a hunger she couldn’t deny awakening in her. As she skimmed her tongue over his lips, he parted them for her, an invitation she followed without any hesitation. Her eyes closed, she let her other senses take over, every feeling enhanced by the reality of having given up one of them.

Their tongues brushed against each other, the contact sending jolts of pleasure right to her core, stoking her building need. Deep inside herself, she knew how this would end, and it felt right. There was only so much counselling could do for you. It helped thinking things through, to talk about frustrations, hurt, dreams that had died, but for the heart to heal, it needed more.

More than anything else she needed to feel him inside her again, the certainty that it still felt right, good. Pulling away when she needed to take a breath, their gazes locked once more, making her realise it didn’t hurt to look at him any longer, that it didn’t make her seething mad. Right this moment, she finally felt like herself again, felt there was a them, instead of a he and she while they were putting up a united front for the rest of the world.

“You are so beautiful,” he said with a hoarse voice, close to breaking.

She believed him, believed that he saw beauty even though she didn’t have the fit body of a twenty year old any longer.

“May I touch you?”

That he even asked was a testament to the hurt they had caused each other, he had caused her, them. All she could do was nod, for once, not knowing what to say.

She kept her eyes open as he reached out, both of his strong hands cupping her breasts. He smiled, as did she. They had always been a good fit. Fascinated, she watched the signs of concentration on his face as he brushed his fingers over her breasts lightly, belying the strength of the hands she knew so well.

Her nipples hardened under his touch, a quiet moan escaping her at the exquisite sensation. What would she even want with any other man? He knew how to touch her, how to inflame her in a way that her world shrunk to the point she was only aware of him and nothing else. So often she wished she could quit thinking if only for a few minutes, and he was the only one ever making her achieve it.

His thumbs rubbed her hard nubs, making sitting still harder and harder as a primal urge made her want to seek friction, release. Instead, she bit her lip, tried to relax into his touch, let the waves of desire sweep through her, allowing the slow build-up of pleasure.

It was challenging, especially feeling his erection twitching against her body, knowing she was wet enough to accept him inside. She would only have to lift herself up, move a little and sink down to join their bodies. The idea alone had her breath catch, her inner walls contract as if she was indeed feeling him inside her. The mind was a truly powerful thing.

She remembered one night when it had been only the two of them, when all obligations had seemed far away. He had talked to her, told her what he liked about her, what he would love to do to her in explicit, erotic detail. Refusing to touch her, to be touched by her, he had worked her into such a state of frenzy it had only needed one tiny brush of his finger against her clit for her to shatter into what had seemed a million pieces.

The power of his voice, of speech had always drawn her in. Since the earliest day she had known him, he had been able to paint pictures with his words, to evoke emotions in his auditory.

“Stop. Please,” he said, interrupting her thoughts, making her focus on him, although she didn’t know what he was trying to tell her.

“No more thinking. Not tonight. I want this to be about us, our love,” he explained. “I love you.”

He did. She knew he did, had always known. Taking a deep breath, willing her body to relax for a moment, she nodded her assent before she leaned in, kissed his lips, showered his face with tiny kisses, unable to stop herself.

He didn’t move, his eye were closed, yet she couldn’t miss the tiny sigh, the way his body relaxed as if shedding a big weight. She smiled, went back to kiss his mouth. He deepened the kiss, began caressing her breasts again, tiny brushes of his fingers over her nipples, followed by tweaking them with his fingers, only to stroke the sensitive underside of her breasts next. He was always unpredictable, and she never quite knew what he would do next, a fact she cursed as much as she liked it.

Needing him to never stop what he was doing while needing more at the same time, she was about to speak out as he leaned down, beginning to suck at one of her nipples, biting down on it one second, licking it with his tongue the next. Unable to hold still, she began undulating on his lap, relishing the bit of friction she found.

Hot, it was too hot, and it wasn’t because of the warm water they were still emerged in. Her whole body was flushed with the wonderful heat of arousal. When he let go of her breasts, she uttered a small sound of displeasure which morphed into a moan as he kissed a trail along her neck until he could tug at her earlobe while at the same time his hands had found purchase on her back, stroking up and down in a rhythm that was everything but soothing.

Her own hands were busy mapping his chest, playing with his flat nipples, having him groan out. Their mouths found each other once again, melding into a kiss that was passionate, tender, so right. It aroused her even further even though she wouldn’t have thought it possible.

Reaching down, she put her hand around his cock, wished this wasn’t a tub, that it was their bed and she could explore his whole body not just with her hands but also with her lips. He throbbed in her hand, and instinctively, she knew it wouldn’t take much to send him over the edge. As much as she loved to see him come, that wasn’t what she wanted tonight. She needed to join with him, to become one, if only for a few minutes.

She lifted herself a little so she could seek the connection she knew they both craved but he surprised her with slipping one of his hands between her legs. Her eyes flew open, met his tender gaze while his fingers lightly brushed her swollen flesh. No other man she had known had fingers as long, as elegant as he had, and he knew how to use them to drive her out of her mind, to erase all thought and replace it with pleasure.

She loved to watch him when he wrote, the pen quietly gliding over the paper, or when he closed the buttons of his shirt, one by one. Once, she had spent hours playing with his hands while they sat on the beach, the sun slowly going down, replaced by stars spending a soft light shining down on them.

He had laughed at her, called her obsessed but had let her be, content to enjoy the moment with her, being in no hurry to go anywhere.

The last years, they had always been in a hurry, one appointment was chasing the next, calls coming in from early morning until late at night. The press had been hard on their heels sporting ridiculous nonsense a lot of the public was still inclined to believe. She couldn’t remember when she had felt truly peaceful for the last time.

She did now, even though her heart beat fast as he teased her labia, sending ripples of pleasure through her body. Her body ached for him to do more than just tease, still she remained patient, wanted to enjoy every second. They deserved this time, needed to heal on every level.

One of his fingers brushed over her clit, once, then twice, her breath hitching in her throat, her thighs aching from the effort to keep herself upright and still. The very tip of his finger began circling her pleasure point, her need spiking, sending her closer and closer to the edge. This was too fast. She wanted to be joined with him when she came, wanted to see the same pleasure she felt reflected in his eyes.

“Please, no...”

He shook his head. “Let me see. We’ve got all night.”

It was a promise of more to come. Taking a deep breath, she nodded, only to moan out as he took up caressing her once more, two fingers sliding into her heat, her inner walls contracting around his digits.

“I could do this to you all night.”

She laughed out, a husky sound. If he did that, she surely wouldn’t be able to move for a week. Although she had to admit it would be nearly worth it and give the press really something to think about.

He added a third finger, stroking her inner walls, murmuring endearments. The beauty of the moment, the desire she felt became too much. Unable to withstand the tide, she let it take her, waves of pleasure rocking her body while her hips began to undulate, had her ride his hand, searching for even the last bit of friction.

“Beautiful. You are so beautiful.”

It took a moment for the words to sink in as her body was only slowly calming down from its high. When they did, she couldn’t help the smile breaking free. For all that happened, she didn’t doubt his love, his honesty when it came to declarations like this one.

“I love you,” he said once more, each word a caress to a wounded soul.

“I love you, too.”

Her whole body ached from keeping it upright for so long, her thighs burning from the strain. Aligning his cock with her opening, she slowly joined them, his groan music to her ears. His eyes fell shot, he bit down on his bottom lip, and she could swear she saw moisture in the corner of his eyes.

She wasn’t the only one wounded, only together they’d be able to heal. Leaning in, she kissed the corner of his eyes as softly as she could, felt his tall frame tremble. To be the one to hold him up when he was vulnerable empowered her, and she knew it was a two-way street. He’d be there for her when she needed him, would be the strength she was lacking. She realised the foundation of their relationship, the respect, trust on most matters, was still intact. They could make it work. Stilling, she gave them both time to adjust to the feeling of being one again.

“Kiss me,” he said, his voice rough with desire, emotion.

Unable to resist the plea, she joined her mouth to his, the contact light, tender, almost heartbreakingly beautiful. She felt the light tremble of his lips, wondered if it wasn’t her. Deepening the contact, his tongue swept over her lips, asking to be invited in. She parted her lips slightly, the first brush of his tongue against hers making her moan and clench his cock inside her which, in turn, made him groan. Without any hurry, she lifted herself until they were nearly separated before she sank down again.

It was a dance they had danced countless times before, always exciting, always beautiful. Although she was still sated from her climax a few minutes ago, she could feel fresh desire well up inside of her. He seemed content with her taking her time, with her wanting to make the most out of each second.

She knew deep inside of her this was a night that would change her life once more, give it a new direction. The walls of ice and fire, born out of desperation and disappointment had been torn down, and if they worked together they could be the team they were once more. Nothing worthwhile was ever easy; it was a lesson her mother had taught her time and again, one she had found to be true more than once in her life.

His hands stroked her back, the touch firm yet tender, making her want to purr like a kitten. When they trailed down to her ass, he aided her movement. Appreciative, she leaned in, bit down on his bottom lip gently, felt his smile against her lips.

They were in tune, their rhythm slow yet stoking their mutual desire. They kissed, time nearly ceasing to exist. The sight of him, his scent, his movements, his moans, it all was mesmerizing her, making her want to draw this out. When he took a shuddering breath, she knew he wouldn’t be able to stand it much longer, though. It was no wonder as he had solely seen to her needs before, holding back himself.

Her hands on his shoulders, she pressed a kiss to his forehead, squeezing around the hard flesh inside of her at the same time.

“Come for me,” she whispered.

“Not without you.”

His eyes were determined, stubborn; she knew he wouldn’t budge, a trait as loveable as it was exasperating. Letting one of her hands trail down her own body, she slipped it between her legs, massaging her pleasure point. He let out a brief curse, and she knew she had his attention while she had heightened his predicament simultaneously.

Their control slipping, they began to move faster, less coordinated, both focussed on their release, the other’s release, taking care of each other as they had done countless times before. A loud moan escaped her but she was past the point of caring, needed emotional as much as physical release.

His hips jerked up, the same time she clenched around him, his control shattering with a hoarse cry. She watched how pleasure overtook his face, saw how the tautness turned into relaxation as desire turned into a state of mellowness.

His eyes opened, found hers, and taking her hands into his, lacing them, he pushed up once more, intent on taking her over the edge with him. It was the look of love in his eyes as much as the need cursing through her veins that shattered her, had her breathing harshly while her every bone seemed to turn into liquid. Gentler this time, her orgasm went on for longer than she had thought possible, her muscles trembling. Unable to keep herself upright, she sank down onto him, their still laced hands between them. His heart was beating fast, his breathing as irregular as hers.

They didn’t speak, words not necessary. It took minutes for them to calm down. In the end, she lifted herself off him, separated their bodies, missing his presence inside her the very same moment. Their gazes meeting, she was taken aback by the vulnerability in his eyes. He didn’t know what to do now, what she could tolerate and what not. While the rift between them was on a road to mending, it was still a long way ahead of them.

Giving him a gentle smile that he returned, she slowly got out of the tub, glad her legs carried her. Reaching for a big towel, she wrapped it around her body, held out a second one to him. She was amused to see he seemed to have as much trouble to move as she had.

Wrapping the towel around his hips, he reached for hers, loosening it before he began towelling her dry. She let him, enjoyed the attention, the care he showed to her. It was something so ordinary but at the same time a luxury they hadn’t granted each other in months. When he was done, she returned the favour before they dressed, got ready for bed.

She assumed he wanted to work a bit longer, to read as he almost always went to bed after her, but instead, he headed for the couch after kissing her on the lips one last time, whispering a quiet ‘thank you’. For a moment, she stood frozen to the spot, indecision keeping her immobile. Would it do to listen to her heart instead of her rational mind? Although, even her rational mind told her if she wanted to take a chance on her marriage again, she’d better do it the right way.

Following him, she saw him turn, a question in his eyes. Smiling, she took his hand, pulled him in the direction of their bedroom.

“Are you sure?” he asked quietly.

“The bed is too cold without you.”

He stopped them, turned her to him, kissing her gently. “Thank you.”

Turning her back to him, she whispered a very quiet ‘I love you’, smilingly. It was true. Always would be. They could make it work. In that, she had always believed, still did.

End


End file.
